Fat Man Review: Girl Scout Bout

Fat Man Review: Girl Scout Bout

If I were to ask you what season we are all currently in the heart of I’d bet majority of you would say Lent or the Easter season right? WRONG!!! We are currently over a month into the 2024 girl scouts of America annual girl scout cookie season.

Girl Scout cookies are as American as apple pie and screaming about personal health while stuffing down a liter of Coke and 2 pounds of nachos. Everyone red blooded American in their right mind has if not currently has at least for the majority of their lives enjoyed the overproduced package boxed of supposedly freshly made cookies with the option of twelve amazing flavors. Girl scout cookies are one of those things that single handedly unite neighbors as everyone enjoys their tasty little treats while telling themselves they are for a good cause.

However the only problem with girl scout cookies that everyone seems to be separated over is which flavor is the best. And that is what I set out to do in this iteration of Fat Man Review.

And to do this we will be taking elements from the earliest Fat Man Reviews there are, taking a poll. So I went around the entire school and asked as many people as I could (without getting in trouble) which flavor was their favorite. And from the 190 people surveyed these are the results.

In last place we have a five way tie with zero votes each-

7th (tied)- Lemonades (0): Nothing really shocking seeing how these are just a worse Lemon Ups

7th (tied)- Toffee Tastic (0): I am still wondering why this is even a flavor

7th (tied)- Toast- Yay! (0): I mean how much more boring can you get

7th (tied)-  Caramel Chocolate Chip(0): A bit surprising seeing how these are the idea of a cookie but still not too shocked

7th (tied)- Girl Scout S’mores (0): This one is in my opinion the biggest upset in the entire poll, seeing as how these are a great third option or even sometimes a good number two option but apparently no ones number one

In  sixth place we have another tie but one with two flavors each receiving one vote each-

6th (tied)- Adventurefuls (1): Although never having one myself I can see how this might be good seeing how it is based off of a fudgy brownie

6th (tied)-Trefoils (1) : This one was voted for because it was her dogs favorite treat and she still loves them even though the puppy is no longer there

5th- Now in fifth we have one I thought was gonna be more popular but I could also see why not and the two people that voted on it just confirmed my theory that they have no taste and that flavor being Do Si Dos

4th- Lemon Ups (4): Not much to say here other than a decent flavor that pairs very nice with a warm day

3rd- Tagalongs (25): A bit surprised that this one didn’t get a bit more votes seeing how with candy everyone and their mothers loved peanut butter + chocolate but hey still nice numbers

Now for the last two I could not believe how close the numbers were and this caused my head to hurt as this may seem like scripted but I assure you it’s not.

2nd- Samoas (78): Personally I was shocked by the amount of people that love this flavor as me personally I hate coconut especially with chocolate but hey not everyone can be correct.



That leaves only one flavor left and this one should be no real surprise as it’s the hands down best flavor at least in my opinion. This flavor is also number one poetically because of St Patty’s day being just around the corner. So without further a-due based on the peoples vote the best flavor of Girl Scout cookies is – THIN MINT!!! *served frozen ofc*

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Angelo ODorisio
Angelo ODorisio, Staff Writer
My name is Angelo O'Dorisio and I chose to because Mr. Yunt was such an amazing teacher for journalism and because it sounded fun. For Holy Family I play guard in football and I wrestled, but outside the school I play house club hockey.

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