Hello everyone and welcome back to the last ever Fat Man Review and the last ever story I write for the Holy Family Lamp Post. And today we will be going over the secret menu items for a place that seems like it preaches about health but actually has just as much sugar as your sodas. Yup Jamba Juice.
The thing that I found to be the most interesting is that Jamba Juice actually has one of the most expansive secret menus of them all.
Jamba Juice has 37, yes 37. And not like very similar drinks just barely different flavors like a peach slushie and a strawberry slushie but whole different tastes for everyone.
As I don’t want to list all of them here is a few of the best looking in my opinion: Skittles, ButterFingers, Chocolate Covered Strawberries, Fruity Pebbles, Berry Depressing, Hello Jesus, Now or Later, Peaches and Cream.
Seeing all of these great options I know I had to go and try them. But since I am already one mukbang from being a type II and another dumb purchase to not being able to fund my gum addiction I asked for some help from a couple of friends and fellow big guys Trevor Stevens and Landon Hood.
Landon got the Peaches and Cream and although I would rank this the lowest out of the three we got that isn’t very fair because his was still amazing, I don’t know what it is about the Peaches and Cream combo but no matter what it always seems to just smack. It was the perfect blend of smoothie and cream taste. And if I could I would drink this one again as it was that good but it wasn’t really a fair competition compared to Trevor’s and mine.
Trevor got the Berry Depressing (don’t worry I asked him if he ever needed to talk to someone after this) but this thing was also just an absolute banger. It was basically a blend of all the berry flavors at the joint. And this one reminded me very much of the old Costco smoothie that probably had more sugar than Willy Wonka’s bloodstream. However, even this masterpiece of a concoction of berry is still number two to a smoothie that has a bizarre name.
The best of the three that we tried was in my opinion the one that I tried. The Drink That Shall Remain Unnamed is relatively simple but the way the flavors come together in this is how it gets its name. A mixture of Peach Juice, Pineapple sherbet, Orange Sherbet, Strawberry Sherbet, Strawberries, Peaches, and Mangos.
This drink was absolutely amazing and I was barely able to stop myself from drinking it long enough to get a picture. I love this drink and this will be my go-to no matter what and heck I might even start making it home it was that good. The only thing is that there are way more drinks that I have to taste and I will try to make it my goal to try all of them.
But with that being said thank you for everything and I hope you guys have a great time as I try and figure out who will take over the mantle of the new Fat Man Review. But either way I know you guys will be in good hands when it comes to getting food advice from the pros (fat people).
